For the Love of Friendship: In Praise and Defence of Philia-Love in Tolkien

Warning: this post is going to offend some people. If you are one of those people, at least be civil when commenting. Until the Thought Police catch me, I will continue to praise and defend Tolkien and his world whether it runs contrary to popular opinion or not.

 Legolas and Gimli on the walls of Helm's Deep

In his wonderful book, The Four Loves, Christian apologist C. S. Lewis (and a good friend of Tolkien's) describes the four different types of love that people display towards one another. There is Storge (Affection), Philia (Friendship), Eros (Romance) and Agape (Unconditional Love). Each love is expressed at various times by the members of the Fellowship of the Ring and I will be touching on all four
loves in other posts, but the main subject with this one will be that of the most misunderstood - and undervalued, overlooked love of all: - Friendship.

Lewis writes that: ''Friendship is - in a sense not at all derogatory to it - that least natural of loves, the least biological, organic, instinctive and necessary,'' and this, to him, makes Friendship the most profound of Loves because because it is freely chosen without any sort of 'benefits' whatsoever. Romantic-lovers are always looking into each other's faces and talking about their love; friends stand side by side looking at (or seeking out) the thing which binds their friendship together; the same truth they both see. Lewis writes ''to the Ancients, Friendship seemed to be the happiest and the most fully human of all the loves; the crown of life and the school of virtue. The modern world, in comparison, ignores it...''

But in Tolkien's books, Friendship is depicted as the most exalted of the loves in a way that - sadly - boggles the modern mind (read the Touchstone article ''A Requiem for Friendship'' to find out why). The whole Tolkien legendarium is littered with pairs of males whose intense, deep and enduring friendships (Frodo and Sam) are just as worthy of honor and recognition as the passion and devotion of the lovers (Beren and Luthien).
 And there are many: Frodo and Sam, Aragorn and Eomer, Merry and Pippen, Legolas and Gimli, Gandalf and Bilbo, Eorl and Cirion, Fingorn and Maedhros, Hurin and Beleg and Finrod and Beren, to name the most well-known.

 young Turin Turambar and Beleg Strongbow
First Age

The duty and love these pairs of friends exhibit and the sacrifices they make for one another- from Sam going with Frodo into Mordor to Beleg, the 'truest of friends,' enduring wandering, capture and injury to find Turin - is quite extraordinary. It puts our modern (and hamstrung) concept of 'friendship' to shame. It also confuses a lot of people who read The Lord of the Rings today. Why? Because now days one cannot form strong platonic friendships - especially same-sex male friendships - in the eyes of a current  society that has become so sexualized, so forceful of the homosexual agenda, that they cannot imagine it being any other way (hence the term: 'Friends with Benefits'). Don't believe me? Just go searching for Tolkien 'fan'-fiction (and some 'art') which takes these pairs of friends and throws them into the homosexual arena of slash fiction. You will find nothing wanting (even the characters of the Silmarillian are subjected to much of this treatment, although their stories will never - thank God - be turned into movie entertainment). But in Tolkien's Middle-Earth it is Philia, not Eros, that reigns supreme. Poor simple Sam shows much physical affection (what, who says platonic friendships can't be physical?) for Frodo: kissing him, hugging him, carrying him, sleeping with him (cloths on) and finally taking him for a piggy-back ride up the slopes of Mount Doom. Back in Tolkien's day, it was still possible for two men (or woman) who were close friends to display their love in such physical ways without being labeled as gay. But now things are very different, and so when some readers now encounter the kinds of friendship displayed in
The Lord of the Rings it is sad (though not surprising) when they then turn and write Sam and Frodo
slash fiction. Some claim they do this in order that the homosexuality-based union of people can have an 'equal' representation alongside the heterosexual one, but what is really happening is that they are
shadowing and replacing an ancient and praiseworthy expression of platonic, non-sexually driven love
[the love of blood-brothers, bosom-friends and battle-comrades] with an abnormal and objectionable
form of 'love' that is only a kind of lust that turns one's 'friend' into one's lover or one's whore (depending
on the views of the submitting and dominating partners of the 'union'). It is can no longer be considered Friendship. And when fan fiction slash writers force Frodo and Sam or Aragorn and Boromir into these kinds of unions they are not only undermining (and denying) the expressions and the reality of a passionate love grounded in friendship and not homosexual lust but they are also placing themselves above Tolkien by ordering his world and his characters in a way that suits and matches their own worldviews and ideas of
what love should be. Philia-Love can no longer be properly understood, so these 'fans' must make it
another kind, a kind they understand much better, and when this is done the deeper trappings of
friendship grounded in ideals and shared interests rather then sexual desire are torn down so all that
remains is the sexual desire and all the introduced feelings, angst and complications that come with it.
That two people of the same sex can draw their love from the spiritual and emotional plain without
dragging in the baser physical urges is a option that has become lost in the hypersexualized age
where if a character is not screwing someone - anyone, then the relationship(s) of said character are
somehow less interesting or important or meaningful then those of the characters that pursue sex within
a relationship whether straight or homosexual. I find it very sad when two male characters who are
friends or comrades-in-arms in classic literature (King Arthur and Sir Lancelot) or shows (Spock
and Kirk) are depicted in slash fiction as having graphic homosexual encounters and desires. It
takes away the relationship they had as friends and states that deep Philia-Love is either (A) impossible,
(B) uninteresting, or (C) unworthy of recognition or respect: hence it must be changed, overshadowed
or turned into a sexual one.

 Fingorn rescuing Maedhros

Thus, there is no room for friendship, no room for blood-brothers and sword-comrades, no place in literature or film for those who can love without the need or desire for 'benefits'. If one says 'I love you'
to his close friend of the same sex, the only meaning this statement has in the modern mind is: 'I want to screw you.' Even when I say 'I love you' to my good friends - both male and female - I always feel a tiny
twinge of awkwardness because I know that I could be easily misunderstood in my intentions to my
said friends, and that my words now could carry a boatload of secret feelings and 'repressed' desires.
It is a dry and sad place nowdays for those who desire to have close bosom friends as the ancients had
of old, and to share that special kind of love that Tolkien's Frodo and Sam or Legolas and Gimli have.
Once, a man could actually share a bed in friendship with his friend and would not be thought of as being sexually desirous of his bedmate. They could express their love freely and deeply, and thus their friendship would reach deep into their souls, and would 'surpass the love of woman' in its knowledge and depth and feeling: a union of hearts and minds rather then bodies.

 Friendship sealed: Elf-King Finrod gives his ring to Barahir
(father of Beren One-hand) as a token of his respect and love
and later dies defending Beren from Sauron's wolves 

But no more. No heterosexual same-sex friends would dare express their love for each other in such a way. And we don't expect them to. Heck, even if a father should linger too long in kissing or hugging his daughter before she goes to school suspicions are aroused. A quick hug, handshake or kiss is all that is tolerated in the affections of modern friendship, anything else implies, well, something else. That is why friendship in the modern mind is considered such a lowly form of love: because it has indeed become so - after all, why have true Friends (people you can trust with your soul and personhood) when you can have Friends with Benefits  i.e. multiple sex partners? Tolkien's characters suffer much for their friendships, both in the books themselves and within certain parts of the modern 'fandom'. The Peter Jackson films skillfully glossed over many of the 'embarrassing' (i.e. the touching and moving) emotional or physical moments between the friends, such as when a smiling, joyful Eomer expresses his delight at going into battle with the Three Hunters: ''[with] Legolas upon my left, and Aragorn upon my right, and none will dare to stand before us!'' or when a weeping Pippen tries to kiss Theoden's hand as he lies dying on the Pelennor Fields or Aragorn holding Boromir's hand and weeping over his dead body, or when Sam hugs a naked, tortured Frodo to his chest after finding him alive in the orc tower and the wearied Ringbearer can have a few blissful moments of peace: ''...[and] he lay back in Sam's gentle arms, closing his eyes, like a child at rest when night-fears are driven away by some loved voice or hand.'' This is one of the most moving scenes of loving friendship in the whole book, and yet we were unable to see it in the movie because the whole thing would have been very misunderstood by many people and the filmmakers knew that if they showed it it would only spark debate and awkward explanations, so this certain display of love was not seen, perhaps for the better (although I believe that the damage has already been done regardless).

  Sam comforting Frodo in Mordor

But not all friendships in Tolkien are of this deep passionate kind. Some are simply lighthearted and happy (yet strong), like Merry and Pippen's friendship with each other, or strange and mysterious, like Merry and Pippen's friendship with Treebeard the Ent, or the playful friendship of Legolas and Gimli that grows more profound and concludes with both of them sailing together to Valinor. Or, perhaps the most wondrous of all the frienships: Gimli's platonic yet passionate love and reverence of the Lady Galadriel,
whose honor he is always defending against fearful and ignorant men. My personal favorite friendship is the one that grows between Pippen and Beregond, a guard of Minas Tirith and Bergil his son (not in movie). Tolkien uses these characters to convey the life and ways and history of the people of Gondor and so that the reader can develop a feel for the lands and types of peoples that Aragorn is to take kingship of. By getting to know some of the inhabitants of Minas Tirith the readers can sympathize and care about them when the armies of Mordor lay siege to the White City, and the friendships that are forged are a looking-glass into the minds and hearts of the heroes and their choices and manners of expressing themselves. I was finally able to find a wonderful illustration of Pippen and Beregond together that conveys perfectly the kind of love that graces the heroes of Middle-Earth like a beautiful cloak that adorns the forms of the great Elf-Lords: a love without benefits: freely offered; freely chosen.

 Pippen and Beregond on the walls of Minas Tirith

      
There they are: a Man and a Hobbit, armed and awaiting the great battle; walking together on the walls of Aragorn's great City, talking: expressing their fears and hopes, getting to know each other without any hostility, awkwardness or confusion, and their friendship becomes one in which their bravery and virtue shine forth: they both save Faramir from being burned alive and later, in the battle before the Black Gates, Pippen saves Beregond himself (they both choose to stand in the front ranks) and almost dies too. Merry forms a similar bond of friendship with King Theoden, and by his desire to be with him and Eowyn's desire to go to battle the Witch-King is defeated. In the First Age, the Elf-King Finrod Felagund sets aside his crown and kingdom in order to aid Beren in his quest to obtain a
Silmaril and dies a violent death in Sauron's dungeons while saving him from a werewolf. If these forms of love grounded in friendship can't be considered just as valid and impotent as romantic love then I don't see what can.

All throughout The Lord of the Rings the members of the Fellowship of the Ring (as well as those they befriend throughout their adventures) use the word 'love' to describe their feelings to one another. While watching Theoden, Eomer and Merry ride from Helm's Deep, Aragorn tells his Ranger friend Halbarad: ''There go three that I love, and the smallest [Merry] not the least. He knows not to what end he
rides; yet if he knew, he still would go on.'' These words convey fully his love for the hobbit and recognition of his courage. After Aragorn is crowned King, he embraces Eomer, saying; ''Between us there can be no word of giving or taking, nor of reward; for we are brethren.'' Eomer's reply: ''Since the day when you rose out of the green grass [of the fields of Rohan] I have loved you, and that love shall not fail.'' The love of these two kings is based not just on their own personal friendship but also on the lasting alliance of Rohan and Gondor, each continuing to aid the other throughout the centuries. In Ithlinien Forest, as Sam watches Frodo sleeping peacefully, noticing how old and beautiful he is becoming and the light that seems to be coming from him, he thinks, quite simply: 'I love him.' And after all their great victories, King Aragorn-Elessar is unwilling to let the Fellowship be dissolved, telling them: ''At last all such things must end, but I would have you wait a little while longer: for the end of the deeds that you have shared is not yet come. A day draws near that I have looked for in all the years of my manhood, and when it come I would have my friends beside me.'' Thus when Arwen and the other Elves arrive the whole Fellowship is there to witness the wedding of Elfstone and Evenstar and see the long and secret hoping and labors of Eros come to fulfillment.

 Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli tending Boromir's body

All the loves (except, in this case, Eros) are found within the Fellowship of the Ring, but what makes Philia stand out so strong is the attitudes that the members hold not just in regards to their living friends but also to their dead friends as well.
After Boromir dies in battle and the Fellowship is broken, the first thing Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli do is tend to his lifeless body, not just debating how they should lay him to rest (cremation is not even considered; only cultures under the dominion of Sauron burn their dead) but also preparing his body for it: 'Now they laid Boromir in the middle of the boat that was to bare him away. The gray hood and elven-cloak they folded and placed beneath his head. They combed his long dark hair and arrayed it upon his shoulders. The golden belt of Lorien gleamed about his waist. His helm they set beside him, and across his lap they laid the cloven horn and the hilt and shards of his sword; beneath his feet they put the swords of his enemies.' They tow him out onto the river and Legolas and Aragorn sing back and fourth his lament as the funeral boat vanishes into the mists of Rauros-falls. These actions were also not depicted in the movie - which is also not surprising: as no one today cares for the bodies of their dead ones - they are now given over to strangers, usually to be burned. But only when their fallen friend is cared for do the Three Hunters turn to the seemingly more 'important' matters. In this radically diverse group of beings nothing is found lacking in terms of compassion, protection, healing, freedom, duty, hope and courage. Even your dead body is cared for and your requiem sung. These are also great expressions of love, though few are left now to understand - or appreciate - them.

The joy and freedom of Friendship, of just being with people who share the same truth without any kind of obligations or expectations (i.e. those ever-looming 'benefits') that are forced on them by confused people who don't understand  that there are (or were) other ways of showing love to others: dying being the greatest of all, in which Pilia morphs into Agape - the great Godlike love (here the crowns go to Boromir, Theoden, Halabard, Glorfindel  Finrod, Gandalf and Frodo). Yes, The Lord of the Rings is always going to stand out there as that giant 1031-page long tome that doesn't contain one dirty joke or sex scene, but in spite of that you will find plenty of love in it nonetheless, and if you have a person  in your life that you consider a true Friend, maybe you will come to regard that person as someone worth
dying for - for he might be the only one who loves you enough to do the same.

 Boromir defending Merry and Pippen

Go HERE for another good article on friendship in Tolkien

'Ride now to Gondor!' - In Praise of the Riders of Rohan

First, I want to give thanks for Jef Murray's post (which is excellent BTW) for inspiration for my own; though I've been meaning to post this reflection for a while. (all songs and quotes are from The Lord of 
the Rings unless otherwise noted)

the banner of the White Horse: the flag of Rohan

'Were now the horse and the rider?...

Where is the horn that was blowing?...

Darkness took them, horse and horseman.

Hoofbeats from afar sank into silence...

The days have gone down in the West...

To hope's end I rode, and to heart's breaking...

Ride now to Gondor...

Fell deeds awake; fire and slaughter...

Red fell the dew in Rammas Echor.'

The above lines are a mix-mash of various Rohirric poetry as is found scattered throughout The Lord of the Rings. In these laments and songs - 'laden with the sadness of Mortal Men' - can the whole belief-system of the Sons of Eorl be derived. The Rohirrim are Tolkien's most respected and exalted sub-created tribute to the Northern pagan peoples of the pre-Christian ages. Although the Rohirrim do have a fuzzy knowledge of the Valar (they credit Orome the Great for bringing the sire of the ancestors of Shadowfax to Middle-Earth) no specific religious practices (apart from King Theoden blessing Merry) are mentioned or described by Tolkien anywhere in the book (which was delibrete on Tolkien's part). Instead, the Men of Rohan's worldview and beliefs can be found in the songs that they sing, for they have yet no written language of their own. Reading these poems, I am struck by the desperate joy in the face of death and doom these people express in their songs. At the Battle of the Pelennor fields King Theoden and Eomer the Marshal know almost for a fact that they are riding to their deaths, yet even with this knowledge the aged King still says to his men as they rally about him before the ride to Minas Tirith: ' ''Now is the hour come, Riders of the Mark, sons of Eorl! Foes and fire are before you, and your homes far behind. Yet, though you fight upon an alien field, the glory that you reap shall be your own forever. Oaths ye have taken: now fulfill them all, to lord and land and league of friendship!'' '

Theoden-King riding into battle

This little pre-battle speech by Theoden is a vital insight into the whole Rohirrim code of honor: First, he reminds his warriors of their oaths: long ago Eorl the Young lent unlooked for aid to the Steward Cirion of Gondor and in thanks for this the Steward gave to Eorl's people the lands that they now dwell in to be their own forever, and both Eorl and Cirion swore oaths (and here Cirion called upon God - Eru the 'One' - and the Valar to be witnesses of the event) that the two kingdoms would live in perpetual alliance and friendship with each other, unless one or the other should full under the Shadow of Sauron. Now, hundreds of years later, Theoden fulfills these same oaths, still seeing himself bound by them, regardless of the great passage of time. They are just as relevant today as they were when they were made, for 'now is the hour.' Second, he bids them to remember who they are: the sons of Eorl and Riders of Rohan, uplifting them with the honor of their ancestry and heritage which (to them) is long and glorious. Third, he does not deny the doom and death facing them but makes mention of a reward. But what reward can there be if they all should die? Not an earthy reward, certainly, but one that touches more on eternal truths, even though the Rohirrim have only a very dim understanding of God and the Powers: 'the glory that you reap shall be your own forever,' Theoden says but what does he mean? Basically he is saying that by honoring the ancient Oath of Eorl and riding to the aid of Gondor and fighting on the Pelennor Fields the Rohirrim are fulfilling themselves in the highest way they know, and that their deeds, even though they may not be remembered, will nonetheless remain great and glorious; not lessened in worth by whatever should happen in the future, even if Sauron should win. And last, Theoden brings forth the chief values of his people (which are the chief values of any honest, noble-hearted people): the love of their lord, their land, and their league of friendship. The Riders of Rohan are not just Gondor's allies, they are also their friends, and as they have done so many times in the past, so also they do now in the War of the Ring, arriving beyond hope just as the Gates of Minas Tirith fall, 'for morning came, morning and a wind from the Sea; and darkness was removed, and the hosts of Mordor wailed, and terror took them, and they fled, and died, and the hoofs of wrath rode over them. And then all the host of Rohan burst into song, and the sang as they slew, for the joy of battle was on them, and the sound of their singing that was fair and terrible came even to the City.'

The Rohirrim fighting in the Pelennor Fields

During this battle, King Theoden slays the leader of the Southrons before he and his knights are attacked by the Witch-King. He is crushed beneath the body of his horse and passes out and does not witness the final confrontation between Eowyn, Merry and the Black Captain. When he comes to he finds Merry the hobbit (who he has become good friends with and who has sworn himself into his service) weeping alone by his side. Their brief conversation is quite moving, for Theoden, now dying, speaks of his gladness to depart this life in honor, seeing his efforts as neither wasteful nor tragic: ' ''Farewell Master Holbytla! My body is broken. I go to my fathers. And even in their mighty company I shall not now be ashamed...
A grim morn, and a glad day, and a golden sunset!''  
So the King of Rohan dies in peace in the middle of a bloodied battlefield, having fulfilled his oaths, content to have been able to fight against Sauron once more after many years of uselessness and weakness under the influence of Grima Wormtongue. ''Ride now to victory! Bid Eowyn farewell.'' are his last words to Eomer, who is now the King of the Mark. But when Eomer he sees his sister also lying near Theoden, he believes that she too is dead, and is filled with rage and despair and he cries out in out in anguish over the hosts of Rohan, saying: ''Death! Death! Ride to ruin and the world's ending!'' But although their charge is powerful and their swords bitter and skilled, the armies of Mordor and Harad greatly outnumber the Rohirrim and Eomer, when he sees the black ships of the Corsairs of Umber coming up the Auduin, knows that the hour of their doom is at hand and death is come to him and all his warriors. But still even then, he does not flee, but riding to a hill he displays the banner of the White Horse and raises his sword in defiance, singing his death-song:

''Out of doubt, out of dark to the day's rising

I came singing in the sun, sword unsheathing. 

To hope's end I rode, and to heart's breaking:

now for wrath, now for ruin and a red nightfall!'' 
   

       

Eomer; Marshal of the Riddermark

''To hope's end I rode and to heart's breaking.'' This line
alone is gut-wrenching because here Eomer is expressing very deep powerful emotions that normally an author wouldn't let a grown, mature, battle-seasoned man show. Hope has ended; his loved ones lie dead; what then is left for him to do but prepare in the only way he knows how to meet his own end?
Eomer is a much more dynamic character in the book then he is in the movies (he smiles a lot more for one thing), and when you read this song you are reading the desperate lament of of a man who
believes that he is about to die along with his King, his sister, and all the Riders under his command as well as all those in Minas Tirith whom they are trying to aid. Yet still he intends to fight to the utmost end, 'and do deeds of song on the fields of Pelennor, though no man should be left in the West to remember the last King of the Mark.'
Eomer is in the prime of his life, healthy and strong, a great warrior and leader of men, but even he is not immune from the agony of loss and defeat and the knowledge of impending death. And the death-toll is indeed massive 'for it was a great battle and the full count [of the slain] no tale has told.'
There is no movie Green-Ghost-Army to come and save the survivors from all those annoying orcs and
Oliphaunts, only living men with blood, sweat and tears who come with Aragorn to fight and die to win victory for Minas Tirith and Osgiliath. But they are remembered, and many of the minstrels of Rohan are busy long after the War with the making of laments and dirges for those who fought and fell in the Great Battle, with 'The Song of the Mounds of Mundburg' being chief:

From oath-keeping to death-dealing (and taking) the people of Rohan exhibit great courage in the face of overwhelming odds, coming to the aid of their allies even though many know that the giving of such aid will only add their bodies to those of their friends. But their love for 'lord and land and league of friendship' override their their fear of peril and death, and they ride to Gondor, to fell deeds under a red sun, their war horns echoing like thunder in the mountains. The language Tolkien utilizes to capture the 'Ride of the Rohirrim' is for me the most awesome and glorious in all of The Lord of the Rings; epic in scope, brief yet profound. One moment you're looking over Merry's shoulder at King Theoden as he gazes in grief upon the burning City of the Sea-Kings, looking old and frail, inwardly debating whether to charge or to ride quietly away and hide in the hills, and then suddenly he rises up in his stirrups and cries out:

''Arise, arise, Riders of Theoden!

Fell deeds awake: fire and slaughter!

Spear shall be shaken, shield be splintered,

a sword-day, a red day, ere the sun rises!

Ride now, ride now! Ride to Gondor!''

He charges, and Tolkien takes you and sets you on a high place where the whole battle can be viewed in
its entirety, and we see King Theoden being 'borne up on Snowmane like a god of old' riding far ahead of
his hosts and the orcs of Sauron wailing and dying and the sun rising, and we are filled with hope and joy
and it is the heroes we are cheering for and the good we are affirming - for these are Men, like us, doing
deeds of valor and honor for their friends that will remained ingrained in our imaginations - to help and
heal and console us when we ourselves sit in our own falling cities under the shadow of death, waiting for
the hope of the Dawn and the rising of the Sun.

The Ride of the Rohirrim

'Doom drove them on. 
Darkness took them, 
horse and horseman;

Hoofbeats afar sank into silence: 
so the songs tell us.'

''So the songs tell us.'' These lines of this poem were made long after the War of the Ring was over and already one gets the impression that the events are already sinking into the realm of lore and myth, to fireside stories and long Beowulf-style poems sung by minstrels in other Golden Halls, recalling the fading memories of the 'Ride of King Thoeden the Old to the Battle of the Pelennor Fields', even as they recalled in earlier ages the 'Ride of Eorl the Young to the Battle of the Field of Celebrant'. It is this rich sense of history that makes Middle-Earth such a believable world. Tolkien never intended Middle-Earth to be set in a parallel universe or on another planet. The events of The Lord of the Rings happened in this world, in a 'imaginative space' created by the lore-wise Professor, and the book itself is written in such a way that can make you believe that once upon a time, an old king named Theoden, a simple lord of plains and vales and horses, led his Riders to the aid of the great City of a highly advanced civilization founded by the survivors of the kingdom of Atlantis, and did deeds of song that were eventually written down (along with many other great tales) in a Red Book by three Hobbits, a copy of which was eventually translated by John Ronald Ruel Tolkien for the enjoyment and uplifting of those dwelling here and now in the Age of Men. For the Rohirrin are Men like ourselves, fallible, mortal and forgetful, but they are brave and courageous and steadfast in keeping their oaths, which is far better then many of us can say of ourselves in this current age. Yes, Elves are awesome, Hobbits are delightful and Ents are flat-out-amazing, but in the end, we the readers are 'Mortal Men doomed to die' and Tolkien presents to us a vision of our own race magnified and exalted, winning honor and glory in spite of mortality and death, in spite of the fact they lived in a pre-Christian age, long before the Incarnation of Eru, not knowing what lay in store for them after they'd left their fallen bodies upon the fields of Gondor. But that did not stop them from doing the deeds at hand. ''Doom drove them on. Darkness took them...'' Yet still they rode on, on to the 'Sea-King's city in the South-Kingdom: foe-beleaguered, fire-encircled' dying far from home and hearth and the green pastures of their fair land. No men display greater love then those who lay down their lives for their friends. King Theoden and his Riders did so, and their rewards will truly be great.

Theoden the Renowned; Lord of the Rohirrim

  

'Forth rode the King, fear behind him; fate before him.
Fealty kept he; oaths he had taken; all fulfilled them.'

'Red fell the dew in Rammas Echor'

The Riddles of Aragorn # 3: Estel the Lover

 Aragorn and Arwen in Lothlorien

The Lord of the Rings is one of those odd books in which romance, love-triangles, explicit sex-scenes and tensions, debauchery, dirty jokes and forbidden/true love issues are not at all central or crucial to the plot of the story. There is indeed very little romance, no sex scenes, and no nagging woman around (with the possible exception of Eowyn) to trip the heroes up or get in the way of their tasks. This annoys a lot of people. It annoyed Peter Jackson, who preformed some serious character-assassinations (and made stuff up) in order to expand the love story of Aragorn and Arwen and make it more crucial in the movies. It does not annoy me; I actually like it. Here are my musings on Aragorn as a lover, the book romances and why they are important, and why Tolkien treated them the way he did.

In the book, there are only a few scenes in which Aragorn and Arwen are physically together. The first is at Rivendell in the Hall of Fire, where the Elves and the hobbits are singing after the celebratory victory feast held in honor of Frodo's recovery from the Nazgul wound. During the feast, Frodo noticed that Aragorn had not been at table, but he had beheld Arwen for the first time, seated close to Elrond, and Tolkien gives a lavish description of her as Frodo sees her, which becomes our impression as well, since we are seeing her through his eyes. Later in the Hall of Fire, as Fodo and Bilbo talk about their adventures together, Aragorn quietly comes in and stands looking down at them smiling. Bilbo looks up and sees him: ''Ah, there you are at last Dunadan!'' he says, ''...Where have you been my friend? Why weren't you at the feast? The Lady Arwen was there.''
''I know,'' says Aragorn gravely, ''but I often must put mirth aside. Elladan and Elrohir [Elrond's sons] have returned out of the Wild unlooked-for and they had tidings that I wished to hear at once.''
This reply is another important insight into the person of Aragorn. Up until this moment, Tolkien gave no indication that he was in a relationship, or that he might be in love with someone. This not-so-causal remark by Bilbo - who knows quite a lot about Aragorn - sheds a new light on the ragged Ranger Frodo has been traveling with for almost two weeks and adds another layer to the mysteries surrounding him. Later, as Frodo and Bilbo are about to leave the Hall, Frodo looks back and sees Elrond, Arwen and Aragorn all together: ''Elrond was in his chair and the fire on his face was like summer-light upon the trees. Near him sat the Lady Arwen. To his surprise Frodo saw that Aragorn stood beside her; his dark cloak was thrown back, and he seemed to be clad in elven-mail, and a star shone on his breast.'' Here, amide the enchanting elven hymns, Frodo (and us) are given a futuristic vision of Elessar the King with Arwen his Queen. They have already been betrothed, but still they must wait, for Elrond will not allow them to wed until the fate of the world has been decided and Aragorn passes his tests and takes up his rightful kingship of Gondor and Aranor

 Arwen at feast in Rivendell

Later, after Aragorn leaves Rivendell and journeys far away with the Fellowship, Arwen must continue to wait, for both of them have long-foreseen this war, and though their lives are long and such waiting can be endured, it is both weary and hard; and who in the end shall have the victory? The Heir of Elendil or the Dark Lord? So in hope and great fear she slowly makes for him a great kingly banner with Elendil's signs of the Tree and Stars and White Crown, which are the symbols of Numenor; the heritage of Aragorn. ''The days now are short. Either our hope cometh, or all hope's end. Therefore I send thee what I have made for thee. Fare well, Elfstone!'' And upon receiving this great gift, Aragorn uses it to declare  himself to the Oathbreakers; riding with it to victory at the battle of the Pelennor Fields and finally flaunts it before the Black Gates of Mordor itself. Arwen is a beacon of light and a quiet support to Aragorn during the War of the Ring, a light in his darkness, the treasure he will claim at the end of all his hardships, the hope of a new life lived in blessedness and peace with the one whom he most loves. Their love for each other is subtly woven throughout the story, shadowy but present, coming at last into full light after the crowning of the King. In the book Arwen never tries to talk him out of nor prevents him from doing any of his duties, duties which may lead to his death and the death of all their dreams; but she has hope, and so does he, and in the end they are victorious and their long waiting and labors finally come to fulfillment.

Then there is Eowyn, the Lady of Rohan. Eowyn has been tending King Theoden as he slowly grows weaker and sicker from the poisons and lies fed to him by Grima Wormtongue. She begins to sink into despair, musing on how inglorious her duties are and how her country and her people have fallen far from the honor and majesty they once had. After Gandalf heals Theoden he honors her by appointing her to be the guardian of the people of Edoras while he rides off to war. She leads the people to Dunharrow (not Helm's Deep) where they will be safe for as long as possible. But this is not what she wants. She has a fighting spirit to match her brother Eomer's but has no outlet to express it. For although her Theoden gives her a sword and armor her task is to defend, not fight. She becomes restless and agitated, for Grima has poisoned her thoughts as well. When she encounters Aragorn in the Golden Hall she sees in him a great leader, a 'tall heir of kings,' under no one's authority but the highest; a way out of the 'cage' she feels that she's in; a man with whom she could win great glory and renown far from her duties and her homeland.

 Aragorn and Eowyn at Edoras

Aragorn notices her, but not in the way she wants, for his heart's true love is for Arwen, and for her he has only pity for her situation, which he cannot alter. For although he is a king he will not go against the commands of Theoden and so forbids her from riding with the Gray Company, though she begs him, even if she does not approve of his choice in roads, saying: ''Lord, if you must go [to the Paths of the Dead], allow me to ride in your following. For I am weary of skulking in the hills, and wish to face peril and battle.''
''Your duty is with your people,'' he tells her. ''Did you not accept the charge to govern the people until their lord's return?''
Shall I always be chosen?'' she laments, ''But am I not of the House of Eorl, a shieldmaiden and not a dry-nurse? I have waited on faltering feet long enough. Since they falter no longer, it seems, may I not now spend my life as I will?'' This is somewhat ironic, because Aragorn, could he have his choice, would not even be on this road. ''I do not choose paths of peril, Eowyn. Were I to go where my heart dwells, far in the North I would now be, wandering in the fair valley of Rivendell.'' He does not seek the Paths of the Dead willingly, but because no other option is available to him. He is also under authority, and must do everything in his power to ensure that his kingdom does not fall. Both have duties to perform, and both must put aside their personal desires and do the deeds at hand before their own dreams can be fulfilled.
Again, Tolkien gives us an example of what it means to be self-sacrificial, and the importance of choosing
the right path, even if that path leads away from peace and love to great peril and possible death.

''But I often must put mirth aside.'' With these words that Aragorn speaks, Tolkien puts forward that he does not believe that love or romance or sexuality is somehow bad or inferior or dirty. What he does do is put these things in their proper place, within their proper context. Mirth and love will come, but not yet. There are more important things happening in Middle-Earth that require all of Aragorn's time and energies and these things take greater precedence over romancing and loving. This is why Tolkien put ''The Tale of Aragorn and Arwen'' into the Appendixes of The Return of the King instead of making it a chapter in the actual book. He felt if he made it a part of the main story it would distract/bog down the reader and draw attention away from the important events that were happening to the Fellowship during the War of the Ring. The doom of Middle-Earth hangs upon a thread and Aragorn must play his part as Frodo moves ever closer to Mount Doom, even at the expense of his own desires and wants. The same goes for Arwen too, and this, to me, makes their love story stronger not weaker; for at the end of the road, when all as been accomplished, Aragorn and Arwen, Faramir and Eowyn and Samwise and Rosie are well rewarded for their patience and endurance, using well their days far better then we who hunger for instant romantic and sexual gratification right now and to whom self-sacrifice, patience and purity are but old-fashioned ideas from a irrelevant age. Not so in Middle-Earth, where the Queen and King of Gondor reign in glory, and Sam plays in his garden with his children, and Eowyn finds love and contentment at last in the kind arms of Faramir. It was well-worth waiting - and fighting - for.  
   

 Peace at last: King Aragorn Elessar with Queen
Arwen Evenstar

''Use well the days.''